Some of you may have seen my post on the single mom’s forum at ms single mama.com about a conversation I had with G’s dad tonight but it really left me riled up so I decided to blog about it as well.
So my current custody arrangement with G’s dad is that I have sole custody and he is granted reasonable and generous visitation with G. He lives quite far away (about a ten hour drive) and so he has come to town a total of four times since G was born (he’s almost 6 months old) and seen him maybe 10 times. The last couple times he has come to town he has stayed for over a week but only seen G a handful of times for a couple of hours and we’ll do the visits in my house. I try to be accommodating when he’s in town but at the same time I don’t want to bend over backwards and cancel things in my life. Especially because he rarely gives much notice of when he’s planning to be in town. So tonight he called me after absolutely zero contact for the past month and a half (aside from sending a support payment with his mom when she visited) and told me that he would be coming to town August 20th-22nd. I replied that that’s fine that he’s coming but that we won’t be in town because we’re going camping. I am not positive of the dates of my camping trip but I know it’s somewhere between the 20th-25th. He said find, and asked about the next weekend and I said we would be going camping somewhere else. He was obviously frustrated but am I wrong or being unreasonable? I have only one month before I start school and I want to spend as much time having fun with G and my family and friends as possible because I know I won’t have much time come September. Also I don’t want to cancel the trip because I know that he’ll come to town and see G maybe 2 times for about 2 hours each time if that. It just doesn’t seem worth it…is that terrible? Am I being spiteful? How do I know whether I’m crossing the line from reasonable to spiteful? I would love any feedback you can give me on this issue!
Reasonable?
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